Road Less Traveled
  Written By Raven

The Road Not Taken

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black
. Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I-
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

- Robert Frost

I've always wanted to be the author of my own destiny. It has taken many years for me to arrive where I am now. I've meandered down the twisted road of life, sometimes stopping at a dead end, which meant back tracking. There were a few times I floated aimlessly in the woods, off the road completely. For several years, I robotically rode the super highway, always questioning; but, never taking any exits. With eyes straight ahead, I was trapped in a profession that others picked out for me when I was younger.

For most of my working years, I've been self-employed. Had I stayed in my chosen-for-me profession, the handwriting was on the wall and the words were not those that brought joy to my heart. Because of the exorbitant costs of malpractise insurance and the whimsical cruelties of insurance companies, many doctors have formed alliances to offset these costs. Several of my colleagues have torn their licenses to practice in shreds, rather than adhere to guidelines that made no sense to them. I know of one gentleman who became a successful drummer. Others have not fared as well, ending their independence and self-reliance, by opening offices with others. This author will refrain from a huge, well-deserved rant and rave about the medical profession, as it has no bearing here.

Self-employment. These are two words that can generate quaking fear for those who crave the stability of a weekly pay check. Granted, there is a certain amount of safety in the knowledge of a steady week-by-week income. Health benefits and company retirement funds are a powerful reason to be at the mercy of others. Being part of a community has its appeal. Two to four week paid vacation packages add to an already enticing set of golden handcuffs.

I have learned that safety is an illusion. Companies close, go bankrupt, downsize. People get fired, laid off. Promotions promised never happen. Depending on how large the population is at any given place of employment, there is always someone or several some ones with whom there is a personality clash, which can make the time spent in the office a living purgatory or hell.

I've seen people continually take the worst kinds of abuses from their employers for the sake of that steady income and benefits. There's at least one big fish in every little pond who takes pleasure in exercising power for power's sake. If you happen to be the one chosen as the target, your life can be miserable for forty or more hours a week.

This article is dedicated to every adult webmaster who arrives at the cross road and to those who are working to get there. To decide whether to take on full-time responsibilities of this business or stay at the regular job and continue earning the money from sites for little luxuries.

Everything is in place. The bank account has some cash in it for the lean times. Sites are making at least enough money to pay the mortgage and food. There's even enough left over for a cup of coffee and a pack of cigarettes. Beer is optional.

It's a heady decision. One filled with the powerful notion, that, each dime comes from your hard work, your creativity, your sweat, frustration and tears. For those of you who are married or involved in a relationship, your significant other has given a thumbs-up.

There are pros and cons to becoming self-employed.

Pro:
Staying at home means making your own hours. You wake up when you choose. Go to bed when you feel like. Make necessary appointments without having to consult a day planner. Go shopping on off-hours, when everyone else is either in school or working. Take the day off when you don't feel like working.

Con:
Staying at home usually means working longer hours than ever imagined. There are no days off; and, justifying to yourself is sometimes more difficult than a boss. Some of the busiest days on the Internet are the very days most people are off. Sites need attention. Building for the present and the future is a necessity to keep the income flowing. Research takes time. Keeping up with the industry trends is crucial and also takes time. If you're part of a webmaster community, there is traveling to shows, networking, posting on boards, reading boards. Site creation. Site tweaking. Sponsor research. Text design. Having talked to many webmasters, thinking up the words to market sites takes an extraordinary amount of time for those whose bent doesn't include sales words. (This is not spam - just observation.) As with owning any business, learning this one and keeping up with it is a full time job.

Pro:
More quality time with children, lovers, spouses, friends. More time to go to the movies, go drinking with your buddies, shop, watch television, and play games.

Con:
Since I became a member of this adult webmaster community, I've found most of my life is spent on the Internet. Whilst this might not be the case for you, I have found that mainstream life doesn't mix well with adult. My hours are very different than those who work nine to five. I don't have a whole lot of time to spare. Being at home can mean less time with those close to you. Keeping what you do separate from your children is involved and can mean intricate plans for office set-up and privacy. Having small children around means multiple interruptions, which can result in lost ideas. Regardless of your situation, one of the biggest complaints is the lack of time to do anything, except that which is work-related.

Pro:
You are the creator your own financial safety.

Con:
One twentieth of every dime you earn belongs to the taxman. Anything you earn over six hundred dollars must be reported to the government. You have to do your own bookkeeping. There is no accounting department when you're on your own. If you decide to incorporate, you need to hire an accountant or tax preparer. If you choose to be a sole proprietorship, you need a business license and you still need to hire a tax person. The adult industry has to be extra careful with taxes.Learn about being a sub-contractor and the forms you'll need.The IRS isn't stupid and they love to audit. Even though their manners are improving, the locks on your doors are just as tight, if you fail to report earned income.

Your steady pay check has come to a screeching halt. Third party processors and sponsors do go out of business, taking your money with them. Shit happens. You need to be just as prepared when you're self-employed, as when you were working for someone else. That awesome site design may or may not sell. There is always a time factor, waiting for your awesome site design to start paying you back for your time and creativity investment, not to mention hosting fees, domain fees, content fees, etc.

Checks don't always come on time. The mails are different now because of the events last September. Some checks take weeks, depending upon their originating city. Wires sometimes get lost. There are those who simply don't pay for work completed. Being on your own means taking seriously the 'money for a rainy day' philosophy.

Pro:
It's really cool being a part of the adult industry. You get to look at porn every day. Telling your friends about it makes you more interesting. Everyone you tell is envious and wants to 'do it'.

Con:
After a year or so in the business, naked bodies become ordinary. Dare I say boring? My perspective has changed in how I view a model's assets. They have become a means to my bottom monetary line. I look at thousands of pics because I need to see what works for my site. I have to figure out how much work is involved in getting rid of the pimples off her ass. In public, no matter where I am, I'm looking at people in terms of content.

Being an adult webmaster, for many, means never talking about it in public. I live in the Bible belt. I would no more tell the check-out lady at the supermarket about what I do than I would jump naked into a lake during a blizzard. I could get run out of town, tarred and feathered. Or, worse. As a result, many webmasters are more isolated.

Pro:
Answering to no one except yourself. Being your own boss.

Con:
That's only true in your dreams. We are born, answering to others and we'll die that way, too. There are sponsor rules. TGP rules. Link list rules. Search engine rules.Third-party processor rules. Webmaster community message board etiquettes to learn. With the Attorney General looking over everyone's shoulders, we walk a very fine line. Care must be taken to only take the risks you're willing to pay.

Having read this over, I wonder why in the world I chose to stay in an industry fraught with perils and insecurities. The cons outweigh the pros. The battle is constant and the victory is never assured.

Still, when I wake up every morning, I'm satisfied. I know that I will be the one to set my goals, regardless of the obstacles in my way. It is my hands that will pave this road I've chosen, my sweat that moves the boulders to the side, out of harm's way, and, my intellect that builds the basis for my future. The mistakes I make are mine and mine to fix. No matter what lies ahead, I can look back and know that I truly am the author of my own destiny. The road less traveled is the one I chose and it HAS made all the difference.